This is the website of Simon Lilley, the comedian. Please have a little look round, it won't take long, and by all means watch the atrociously poor quality videos of me being amusing. The one with me doing stuff about buses is particularly funny simply because I appear to have no face. Drop down to news/blogs for info about my Edinburgh show. It's too early to say I love you but thank you for dropping by.
- Alistair MacGowan
- Geoff Whiting, Mirth Control
- Matthew Crosby
audience review - Edfringe.com
a blah blah kind of section with info of where I'm performing, plus thoughts (blogs)
I'm doing a show about God, Greed and Football. It is called:
both links above are also in the video gallery so you may have already clicked on it. Sorry to be repetitive. Why don't you just buy tickets and come along..?
Last year we (that's me and my wife) thought we would go a whole year without shopping at a supermarket. We lasted about 3 weeks.                                                                                                                                                                                      I really like the idea of ethical shopping but it can be really expensive. Organic butchers and grocers generally only spring up in posh areas.                                                                                                                                                                      It's not profound to say that supermarkets succeed because they make life so convenient. Everything in one place, loads of choice blah blah blah. Supermarket shopping is a fairly impersonal experience. Some people like the impersonal. That is the perverse charm of a supermarket. Generally, you only have to speak to checkout workers. Those people are either friendly or depressed and you can usually choose who to queue for. (That is, after all, the great strength of a supermarket: choice) If your checkout operator looks too chirpy for your mood then join a different queue. Or there's always the self-checkout. If all goes to plan and you don't have an 'unexpected item in the baggage area' then you may not have to talk to anyone at all. So much less intimidating or interactive than engaging with a fishmonger or vegetable market seller.                                                                                                                                                                             Nothing to do with food shopping but when I wanted to buy a tripod to get the best out of my iphone camera - yeah I'm aware that iphones aren't produced in the most ethical way but what can you do? - I looked around in local shops (Rule #1 of being ethical surely involves trying to buy in an actual shop thus keeping high streets alive). But I found nothing in my local area. And I couldn't find a way past Amazon, the giant UNETHICAL UK tax-avoiders whose very existence is everywhere on the web. By attempting to avoid Amazon and by looking at other websites I found a very good product from the US but the shipping cost was as much as the product. So I ended up ordering from Amazon and felt the empty feeling of defeat. They had a large choice from the very cheap to the expensive. I didn't want anything fancy. It was so easy paying as well. (One of the strengths of Amazon is the ease with which you can pay once you have an account with them.)                                                                                                                                                                                           Anyway, back to supermarkets and food shopping, I confess supermarkets I find them enjoyable, for all the homogonised soullessness. Different local supermarkets hold various levels of pleasure for me. It feels like a guilty pleasure but I much prefer going to Sainsbury's in Chiswick on a Friday morning than working. That is my favourite supermarket near to me. I drive there and normally buy a Big Issue off the vendor there. Yeah it's a guilt offering. It might make up for some of the purchases that I'm about to make which do very little to help struggling farmers, vegetable pickers, factory workers, or fishermen, or fish.                                                                                                                                                             The thing that I try not to compromise on, ever, is shopping at Tescos. I try to never shop there. I loathe Tescos with a depth that is hard to express. Because they're everywhere and I don't want them to be. Every little helps them and them alone...And when I Googled (oh yes, another evil tax-avoiding giant) the iphone tripod, guess what, Tescos came up with something. I won't stoop that low. For all the choice that supermarkets give us, many people have no choice about whether we want another Tesco nearby. But with online shopping there are alternatives to Tesco. There's sainsbury's and ocado for a start. And there are organic food deliveries (which we find aren't cheap but help us to cut down on supermarket visits). We also have milk delivery 3 times a week. Yes, a milkman, just like the olden days.                                                                                                                              Returning to Amazon, I told a friend today that I was writing this blog about big companies and supermarket shopping and she told me that she had stopped shopping on Amazon because of some rant or other that she'd heard from either me or my equally well-meaning and right-on wife. And she told me that she'd managed to influence a work colleague to stop shopping on Amazon. So what a hypocrite I am. I'm really looking forward to my iphone tripod arriving.